No relationship is ever perfect, and the strongest relationships are an ongoing negotiation of personal quirks and foibles. Healthy relationships are all about forgiving certain things and working through others, but there are some behaviors or dynamics that you should never have to work through or ignore. The video above has some pretty strong ideas about what constitutes a big red flag in the relationship department. The list below has more details on signs that you should never turn a blind eye to, especially early in a relationship.
They Always Show Their Jealousy
A little jealousy is normal, particularly in the early phases of relationships where you’re both still feeling a little insecure about your new love. But if jealousy is constantly a part of the conversation, this is a definite red flag. It shows a lack of trust. And no matter how well behaved you are or how much you deny, it will never be enough,
They Constantly Tell Seemingly Little Lies
Little white lies might seem innocuous at first, but they can reveal a deeper problem, and you can expect a lot more dishonesty down the road. If a man can’t be trusted to tell the truth in the little things, why should he be trusted with your heart?
They Want to Keep Their Friends Separate
You should be with someone who wants you to be a part of every facet of his life, and he should be proud to show you off to his friends. Wanting to keep you away from his social network is a sign that maybe he isn’t telling you the whole truth about himself. At the very least, he is trying to keep you a secret.
They One-Up Everything
If you’re good at something, she is always better. You have a funny story; hers is even funnier. This person needs to feel like the center of attention at all times. This can mean that there will never be enough room for both of you.
They Even One-Up the Bad Things
You’ve had a bad day, but his day was downright TRAGIC. If you see this early on, you should question if this person is going to be able to adequately support you during the ups and downs of everyday life.
They Seem to Enjoy Misfortune
If he laughs at someone else’ misfortune–especially someone who means something to you–you’re seeing a nasty quality. People like this will bring nothing but negativity into your life.
They Treat You Like a Project
You are a person, not a problem to be solved. You are complete and whole on your own, and you don’t need your partner swooping in to try to fix you in a way that meets his standard.
They Keep Score
Disagreements will come up regardless of how strong your relationship is. The difference between a healthy relationship and an unhealthy one, however, is whether or not your significant other keeps score. Both people should give and both people should take. Keeping track like you’re trading business transactions is exhausting and ruins relationships.
They Expect Too Much, Too Soon
If you feel as though things are moving too quickly, they probably are. Your partner’s willingness to slow down to a pace you’re more comfortable with is very important.
You know the old saying: Once a cheater always a cheater. And while it may not be a deal breaker for you personally, statistically speaking, if they get away with cheating once, they are more likely to do it again.