The longer you’re with someone, the fewer your romantic interludes – and often, the less creative they’ll be. On one hand, your goal for dating is to find “the one” to spend your life with, but on the other hand, it’s easy to long for the early days in your relationship when your heart beat wildly during every encounter. This winter, add some spice to your relationship by taking a “summer beach vacation”—in your imagination—while staying warm and cozy at home.
Visualization is a key technique therapists and counselors teach for reducing stress. It involves picturing a place that relaxes your mind, such as a sunny beach, and shutting out all distractions so you can truly imagine yourself there. This helps you enjoy some of the benefits of actually being there, such as rhythmic breathing and a boost in feel-good endorphins. Visualizing a beach with your loved one will make you both feel better in the middle of winter.
Roleplaying of virtually any kind can add spice to a stagnant sex life, plus it can make you both laugh! When it comes to the middle of winter, imagining yourselves on a beach can be fresh and exciting. Maybe you’re a couple of vacationing strangers who meet over a tropical drink, or you’re a fabulously wealthy tourist and he’s your sexy cabana boy. Wear your swimsuits to make the experience feel more real, and turn up the thermostat or use a space heater if necessary to make yourself comfortable in cold temperatures.
How to Make It Happen
While a lot of the beach visualization exercise can be done through the power of your imagination, appeal to your senses to help you play along. Here are some tips to help you feel like you’re at the beach even when the snow is piling up outside:
- Take a bath together and relax in the cool waters
- Bring a kiddie pool inside (be careful not to spill) and lounge in your swimsuits with an umbrella drink in your hand
- Decorate the room in a beach or Hawaii theme, complete with coconut cups, tropical flowers, and lantern candles
- Play tropical-themed music or ocean sounds
- Bury your feet in a container full of sand to feel the grains between your toes
- Cook meals from ingredients, such as poi and seafood, found in the tropical locale of your desires
- Watch beach-themed movies
Not everyone can afford to take time off of work and spring for airfare and a resort in a sunny locale. However, taking a bit of time and imagination to add some spice to your long-term relationships can help stave off the depressing and unfulfilling winter blahs. Pretending to be on a summer vacation may seem silly at first. But once you get into it, you’ll wonder why you ever hesitated.